Friday, April 22, 2011
It has been a rough couple of days, but we are so blessed to have wonderful friends who are making sure they are here for us. I am so thankful for all of my Spark friends who have sent notes and goodies. We may be strangers but I will be forever grateful to all of you who took the time to show you care-it has made it just a little easier to bear this terrible hurt.
My poor DH is not only having the chest pains but now he is sinking into depression. Friends are trying to reach out and keep us occupied so we aren't thinking about not being able to head north.
Our kids are managing and the funeral is set for Sat morning so say a little prayer that things go well. Too much blame game going on and I spent an hour this morning on the phone with Jeremy's widow so hope I have helped to put a little bit of reason into the mix.
I am trying to shield DH from as much of this as I can - he doesn't need to feel any worse than he does and I have had to get a bit snippy when the kids tried to guilt him into flying up for the funeral. I hate to be the voice of reason but had to tell them he isn't well enough for the trip so hoping they will finally understand.
I am now just praying that we will continue to be able to see our great grandchildren. I asked Jen to please not cut the family out of their lives so only time will tell.
I have found my outlet to my grief, I walk or work in my gardens. DH doesn't have the luxury of doing that, he can't do anything much at present so he has way too much time to sit and think and get more depressed.
Thank you all - God Bless each of you for your words of comfort. We are taking things one day at a time and know that it will take time to heal.