Resiliency: Internalizing Success

"It is also possible to be hurt and to rebound at the same time. We human beings are complex enough psychologically to accommodate the two. What the resilient do is refrain from blaming themselves for what has gone wrong. In the language of psychology, they externalize blame. And they internalize success; they take responsibility for what goes right in their lives."

~Hara Estroff Marano, "The Art of Resilience"

Everyone needs reminders of the strengths they have. Cultivate resilience by thinking along three lines:

-- I Have: strong relationships, structure, rules at home, role models.
(These are external supports that can be sought after and attained.)

-- I Am: a person who has hope and faith, cares about others, is proud of myself.
(These are inner strengths that can be nurtured and developed.)

-- I Can: communicate, solve problems, gauge the temperament of others, seek good relationships.
(These are interpersonal and problem-solving skills that can be acquired.)