How do you see yourself?
Friday, June 05, 2020
As I was reading a SPF Blog, I immediately understood, her post. She was talking about a friend not feeling comfortable exercising as a group.
I personally can understand her friend. It took a lot of effort because I was ALWAYS Morbid Obese, and still considered that, although I feel Awesome! Yup, awesome!!! Because in my mind, I still was that overweight little girl, tween, teenager, young adult, and well into my adult years. I have struggled with "the look" from others, but now, I feel so much better.
December 2010, and you can see from my photos on my page, I was struggling with weight....big surprise, it was a big part of my life anyway! That IMAGE, sunk in my head, that is the only picture I could see, in my minds eye no matter how hard I worked. So starting on SP and deciding I HAD TO MAKE CHANGES! I had to start, anyway, I could, so I started going to the pool. OMG, wearing a bathing suit, another photo on my page, was NOT something I was proud of.....but I DID GO! I swallowed hard, climbed slowly into the pool and started walking, back and forth, back and forth, over and over again for a SOLID HOUR! It was difficult to say the least. 20 minutes, I was pushing, looking at the clock, WTH, is that sucker even moving? But it did, so I went from walking to running in the pool! Sound funny? Well it was!!!! I "played the music in my head, because music was NOT allowed at the Y, at that time....from CHARIOTS OF FIRE!" That music, I pretended I was running, hurdling over which I normally can not even lift my legs much, but I did it! Slowly, but surely, I added weights, strength training, and Zumba Gold, which is for seniors, if it is taught well, with a great instructor is Awesome!!!!
Fast forward to today, I still keep "tweaking my program" I exercise, to the BEST OF MY ABILITY whatever works, for the time in my life, like during my "recovery from my surgeries." I allow myself to eat anything, as long as I am mindful and keep SERVING SIZES in tack. This is what works for me.....am I done? Nope! It is a Lifestyle way of life! Each step I take, each day I work, again repeating...."To the Best of my Ability!" To keep those lifestyle changes in tow!
So YES, I am much happier at how I look, my size for my height of 4'11" will always be a BMI disaster according to some doctors charts, but I DON'T CARE! I feel good, I feel healthier, I know I weigh Less Than I did in GRADE SCHOOL and HIGH SCHOOL and a graduate of 52 years ago!!!! So I am happy....and I will not stop, remember it is a Lifestyle!!!!!