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Plan Moving Forward

Tuesday, October 27, 2020

Normally I don't do three blogs in one day, but today is a pretty special day. I wanted to get a plan in motion right away, as well, as far as my health goes, and I wanted to really commit to it, so doing it in my blog always seems like the best place to do it.

I really have to start re-evaluating my plans. Now that I have such extensive pain relief and such a good outlook for things, I have to start looking at what my future plans will be as far as health and fitness go. I don't know exactly how fit I am at this point. Nor do I know what my appetite is really like or what lingering food issues I have, if any. This diagnosis really changes everything. Suddenly something that felt degenerative and permanent feels totally changeable.

I just feel like I have this huge opportunity opening up to me again. It's like a new lease on life. So many avenues and doors had been closed to me and now they've all been opened back up and so I'm a little bit in awe because I had 100% accepted my fate and now God is like "Just kidding, gotcha." I've always said God has a great sense of humor.

So I'm kind of loosely figuring things out. I'm not 100% recovered yet--in fact I'm just beginning to recover--so I can't really put together anything too concrete. But I can kind of get started with things. So I'm going to try to highlight my temporary plan for things.

Nutrition: It's time to really start pursuing things with nutrition. I should be able to start preparing food and planning meals again and really putting honest thought and effort into things again. It does feel a little overwhelming at the moment, but I know if I just start at the simplest place with it and work from there, I will get the ball rolling. I'm going to make a new plan for groceries and really aim for the healthiest plan possible and also re-evaluate my calorie range.

Fitness: I actually can't believe I'm saying this, but it's time to make a more ambitious exercise plan. Nothing too strenuous yet because I'm not THERE yet, but something to start working towards it. I think I'll actually be able to do traditional exercise in a few months and not have to work out in a chair anymore. Good thing I have Fitbit Premium now, right?? I think I may even be able to take up running eventually which is always something I wished I could do. And now I'll be able to pursue my weight lifting goals again like I was doing before.

Hydration: I'm not needing so much sugar/caffeine to function anymore so drinking water is just easier and more appealing now. It seems way more natural. I remember I never even drank soda in the past. I just drank water and black coffee. It was pain that got me to doing so much emotional eating/drinking. It's weird cos now I'm remembering all this stuff that I used to do that was so healthy etc. and habits that I have that indicate how much pain I was in.

Sleep: Now I can work on developing a really healthy sleep schedule.

Cigars: To be perfectly honest I don't think I actually have COPD. I think that was another thing due to inflammation. But I've decided not to quit smoking.

General Health: I guess miracles can happen.

Weight Loss Bloat & Inflammation: Inflammation going down fast. Right now I'm still the same weight, but I don't want to fall into that old trap of expecting miracles from my body. The first time around when I lost the 100 pounds I was losing weight super fast but I always expected more and faster and was super demanding of myself and ended up with body dysmorphia.To be honest I can still tell I have it and struggle with it and still struggle with a lot of my bulimia issues especially overexercising and restriction and orthorexic tendencies. I'm such an incredibly rigid person which is why I've fallen into anorexia many times before and I do worry about slipping into those old behaviours now. The thing is, when I'm in extreme pain situations, I fall into emotional eating patterns and gain huge amounts of weight. When I'm feeling really good, I fall into really rigid noneating patterns. I'm such an extreme person which comes from the extreme pain I've dealt with and yet try to walk the middle path so I'm a total contradiction really.

I hate to go on and on because I know I bore everyone. Moving on. Motivation: Motivation is like through the roof at this point. I know I was nominated a motivational member for positive attitude and I feel like I can truly live up to that now. If you're ever struggling, just remember: there is a solution to every single problem. You just have to keep focusing on the solution, not the problem. It took them 34 years to find the solution to my problem. But they found it.

Meditation is going to be indispensable. That I do know for sure.

So I'm going to try to move forward from here and just take it one step at a time, see what results I get.
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