I've abandoned Spark for the most part because My Fitness Pal simply has a better app for tracking (and my iphone syncs steps taken right into MFP), but I have been checking back in lately because in this never-ending weight loss journey, I have found value in these blog posts. They really serve as the best history of my weight over time. It's like having a little time machine that shows me what I was trying at the moment, the struggles, the successes.
I had a doctor appt last year, and was pretty mortified to see my weight at 192. I had hit goal! How did I let that slip away??? I was still teaching one zumba class/week, still not eating "that bad" (more on that later). But I had gained back FIFTY of the 75 lbs I'd worked so hard to lose from '08-'12. I really didn't get my butt in gear until first of the year. I realized I'd need to bite the bullet and start tracking EVERYTHING again. I took up running once/week, and a weekly yoga class as well. My weight climbed to 194.6 a few weeks in. I was discouraged, but thought it could be hormonal. A week or so later, I hit 197. WTF. HOW COULD A PERSON EATING LESS THAN 1325 CALORIES A DAY, WORKING OUT THREE DAYS A WEEK GAIN WEIGHT?!??!?!?!??!?!?!??!?!?!
I had a hissy fit. I looked through my old Spark blogs and man oh man. I have tried a number of things over the years, but the undeniable fact is grains/carbs/sugar affect me badly. I am not, and will never be, one of those lucky people who can eat "everything in moderation," as the first 5 weeks of this year taught me. I did not want to restrict what I can eat. I've been down that road before, and while I did lose, I always gained back.
Here's the thing i've discovered though: I have PCOS, which I knew due to infertility issues years ago, but I had no idea that PCOS affects weight loss as well. Turns out insulin resistance goes hand-in-hand with it. So the carb thing became less "stupid restriction" in my head, and more "this is how my body operates, and if I want to do what is best, I need to consider that."
I've lowered my carbs to 50g or less daily, and have gone from 196lbs on 2/8/18 to 173.6 as of this morning. It's slow, that's just how my body rolls. But it's happening, and I feel better than I have in a LONG time. I'm still 28lbs from goal, but I stopped the upward trend, and am dedicated to making this my way of eating for life. I don't feel deprived, even, but empowered. Posting this for my future self, as a reminder that I CAN control how I feel, and the number that appears on the scale.