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EDWARDS1411's Photo EDWARDS1411 SparkPoints: (1,380,251)
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5/5/21 12:56 P

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Val

Moving More! Eating Less!
Motivation gets you started, habit keeps you going!

PRINCESSPP's Photo PRINCESSPP Posts: 10,478
2/19/21 1:02 P

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Lol ... thanx. ..needed that!!!

Sally (dba PrincessPP)

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2/19/21 10:17 A

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Val

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1/2/21 11:26 P

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Ooooo Val ... baaaddd Val ....lol

Sally (dba PrincessPP)

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1/2/21 8:38 P

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Val

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PRINCESSPP's Photo PRINCESSPP Posts: 10,478
12/19/20 4:04 A

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Read this about a week ago .. one of my friends posted it on FB .. and it raised a giggle ..

"Y'all think 2020 was bad .... just wait till it turns 21 and starts drinking" .... lol


Sally (dba PrincessPP)

Co-leader: Spark Wisconsin
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12/18/20 4:19 P

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Val

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11/27/20 1:58 P

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Val

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11/5/20 10:44 A

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Val

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10/30/20 12:53 P

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What do ghosts eat for supper?
Spooketi!

What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween?
Pillowcases!

What do witches put on their bagels?
Scream cheese!

Val

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8/6/20 12:50 P

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Val

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6/22/20 11:43 A

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Val

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4/29/20 7:00 P

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Timely...LOL!



Val

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4/18/20 2:32 P

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Val

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2/16/20 1:46 P

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Sunday Smile

(Enlarge to read easier.)




Val

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1/25/20 1:20 P

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An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle.

She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lungs, “I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!”
The four men didn't wait for a second threat.
They got out and ran like mad.

The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat.
She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition.

She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It was for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee and
two 12-packs of beer in the front seat. A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down.

She loaded her bags into the car and drove
to the police station to report her mistake.

The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun.

No charges were filed.

The moral of the story?

If you're going to have a senior moment… make it memorable.


Val

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1/25/20 12:03 A

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Val

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1/15/20 1:59 A

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Val

Moving More! Eating Less!
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PRINCESSPP's Photo PRINCESSPP Posts: 10,478
4/30/19 5:17 P

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Oh ... thank you... needed that smile today..... emoticon

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4/30/19 5:14 P

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Val

Moving More! Eating Less!
Motivation gets you started, habit keeps you going!

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4/5/19 11:17 P

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I agree LOL!

Val

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PRINCESSPP's Photo PRINCESSPP Posts: 10,478
4/5/19 4:12 P

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I think so Val....lol

Sally (dba PrincessPP)

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4/5/19 1:11 P

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Val

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3/21/19 9:30 P

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Val

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PRINCESSPP's Photo PRINCESSPP Posts: 10,478
3/17/19 2:02 P

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Ha ha ....love it Val!!!

Sally (dba PrincessPP)

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3/17/19 1:28 P

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Val

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PRINCESSPP's Photo PRINCESSPP Posts: 10,478
3/10/19 7:34 A

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emoticon love it ... thank you emoticon

Sally (dba PrincessPP)

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3/6/19 10:33 P

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Val

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2/22/19 2:30 P

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Val

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2/12/19 2:33 P

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Val

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1/12/19 2:06 P

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Val

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1/7/19 7:33 P

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Val

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12/31/18 12:18 A

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Val

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WADDLINGALONG's Photo WADDLINGALONG Posts: 2,248
12/29/18 12:32 P

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emoticon

Rest. Reset. Regroup


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12/29/18 12:30 P

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emoticon

Rest. Reset. Regroup


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12/11/18 2:14 P

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Val

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11/29/18 7:10 P

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Val

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10/31/18 12:31 P

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Val

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10/26/18 1:25 A

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Val

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7/21/18 10:23 A

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Val

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7/17/18 4:16 P

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Val

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6/12/18 11:13 A

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Val

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5/22/18 12:39 A

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KELLY_SS Posts: 4,990
6/5/17 5:18 P

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''I felt so good like anything was possible
I hit cruise control and rubbed my eyes
The last three days the rain was unstoppable
It was always cold, no sunshine

Yeah runnin' down a dream
That never would come to me
Workin' on a mystery, goin' wherever it leads
Runnin' down a dream'' .... Tom Petty

******************************
RA & Fibro Warrior - Spoonie 4 Life -- Rockin' Red Foxes


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6/5/17 1:11 P

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Val

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''I felt so good like anything was possible
I hit cruise control and rubbed my eyes
The last three days the rain was unstoppable
It was always cold, no sunshine

Yeah runnin' down a dream
That never would come to me
Workin' on a mystery, goin' wherever it leads
Runnin' down a dream'' .... Tom Petty

******************************
RA & Fibro Warrior - Spoonie 4 Life -- Rockin' Red Foxes


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KELLY_SS Posts: 4,990
6/4/17 2:03 P

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These made me giggle. I already like the vibe in this group.

''I felt so good like anything was possible
I hit cruise control and rubbed my eyes
The last three days the rain was unstoppable
It was always cold, no sunshine

Yeah runnin' down a dream
That never would come to me
Workin' on a mystery, goin' wherever it leads
Runnin' down a dream'' .... Tom Petty

******************************
RA & Fibro Warrior - Spoonie 4 Life -- Rockin' Red Foxes


 current weight: 281.0 
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6/2/17 12:27 A

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Val

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MINNIEUK's Photo MINNIEUK Posts: 7,154
5/26/17 2:32 P

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Love it! emoticon

*Minnie*

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5/26/17 2:24 P

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Val

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CD17438854 Posts: 583
4/27/17 5:58 P

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Ha ha, like that one Val, made me chuckle

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4/24/17 7:32 P

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Val

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4/19/17 1:38 P

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Cute emoticon

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4/18/17 11:09 A

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Just a few seconds, but it will leave you smiling ... beagle who sings and plays the piano ...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=J6nhS
DAKRj8


Good job Buddy!!!

Val

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3/11/17 8:19 P

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Val

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CD17568185 SparkPoints: (10,124)
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2/18/17 6:42 P

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Edited by: CD17568185 at: 2/25/2017 (09:45)
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2/18/17 12:22 P

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Good one

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2/18/17 10:37 A

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Val

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2/14/17 2:04 A

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emoticon

Val

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Good one Val. emoticon



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2/13/17 6:27 P

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Sorry, but I couldn't resist!



Val

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12/24/16 9:00 P

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Val

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12/21/16 7:13 P

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Val

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12/10/16 4:17 P

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Val

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11/15/16 3:57 P

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Val

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9/1/16 11:49 A

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Val

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Got these from another team - they're too good not to share!!!

A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' mother's name?" One child answered, "Mary." The teacher then asked, "Who knows what Jesus' father's name was?" A little kid said, "Verge." Confused, the teacher asked, "Where did you get that?" The kid said, "Well, you know they are always talking about Verge n' Mary.''

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3 -year-old, Reese: "Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen."

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A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, ! if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am."

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A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, "Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbor's wife."

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After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys."

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I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer for several evenings at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some E-mail.


Val

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10/4/10 4:16 P

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HOW TO BE A GRACIOUS BITCH

Jennifer's wedding day was fast approaching. Nothing could dampen her excitement - not even her parent's nasty divorce.

Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear, and would be the best-dressed mother-of-the-bride ever!

A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father's new, young wife had bought the exact same dress as her mother!

Jennifer asked her father's new young wife to exchange it, but she refused. "Absolutely not! I look like a million bucks in this dress, and I'm wearing it," she replied.

Jennifer told her mother who graciously said, "Never mind sweetheart. I'll get another dress. After all, it's your special day."

A few days later, they went shopping, and did find another gorgeous dress for her mother.

When they stopped for lunch, Jennifer asked her mother, "Aren't you going to return the other dress? You really don't have another occasion where you could wear it."

Her mother just smiled and replied, "Of course I do, dear.....I'm wearing it to the rehearsal dinner the night BEFORE the wedding."

(NOW I ASK YOU - IS THERE A WOMAN OUT THERE, ANYWHERE, WHO WOULDN'T ENJOY THIS STORY?)


Val

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CD1928831 Posts: 17,679
9/4/10 1:36 P

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emoticon I think I was behind Grandma today!

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9/3/10 11:27 P

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Grandma is eighty-eight years old and still drives her own car. She writes:

Dear Grand-daughter,

The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a 'Honk if you love Jesus' bumper sticker.

I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting.

So, I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.

Boy, am I glad I did; what an uplifting experience that followed.

I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good he is and I didn't notice that the light had changed.

It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed.

I found that lots of people love Jesus!

While I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy and then he leaned out of his window and screamed,

'For the love of God!'

'Go! Go! Go! Jesus Christ, GO!'

What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus!

Everyone started honking!

I just leaned out my window and started waving and smiling at all those loving people.

I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!

I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air.

I asked my young teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant.

He said it was probably an Hawaiian good luck sign or something.

Well, I have never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign right back.

My grandson burst out laughing!!

Why even he was enjoying this religious experience!!

A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment, that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me.

I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed.

So, grinning, I waved at all my brothers and sisters and drove on through the intersection.

I noticed that I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared.

So I slowed the car down, leaned out the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.

Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!!

I will write again soon,

Love, Grandma.




Val

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SIRIRADHA's Photo SIRIRADHA Posts: 15,470
8/25/10 1:03 P

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Snort!

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8/24/10 12:34 P

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emoticon

CD4653069 Posts: 5,156
8/24/10 7:33 A

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emoticon emoticon emoticon

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8/23/10 9:06 P

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A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, "I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir."

The driver says, "Gee, officer, I had it on cruise control at 60; perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."

Not looking up from her knitting the wife says, "Now don't be silly, dear -- you know that this car doesn't have cruise control."

As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once!!?"

The wife smiles demurely and says, "Well dear you should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did or your speed would have been higher."

As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Woman, can't you keep your mouth shut!!??"

The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine."

The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see, officer, I had it on, but I took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket."

The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving."

And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket, the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP!!??"

The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?"

(I love this part)

"Only when he's been drinking."


Val

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7/25/10 5:11 A

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Way too cute! Love the leg action and the side-to-side body movement!! Thanks so much for sharing!!!

Val

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CD1928831 Posts: 17,679
7/23/10 12:35 A

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Can you help not "dancing" along....(and laughing)?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ikTxfIDYx6Q

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7/16/10 4:25 A

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Mirror, mirror on the wall
Do you have to tell it all?
Where do you get the glaring right
To make my clothes look too darn tight?
I think I’m fine but I can see
You won’t cooperate with me,
The way you let the shadows play
You’d think my hair was getting gray.
What’s that, you say? A double chin?
No, that’s the way the light comes in,
If you persist in peering so
You’ll confiscate my facial glow,
And then if you’re not hanging straight
You’ll tell me next I’m gaining weight,
I’m really quite upset with you
For giving this distorted view;
I hate you being smug and wise
O, look what’s happened to my thighs!
I warn you now, O mirrored wall,
Since we’re not on speaking terms at all,
If I look like this in my new jeans
You’ll find yourself in smithereens!!

Val

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7/15/10 12:27 P

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Brain Exercise

Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles. As we grow older, it's important that we keep mentally alert. The saying: "If you don't use it, you will lose it" also applies to the brain.

Below is a very private way to gage your loss or non-loss of intelligence. So take the following test presented here and determine if you are losing it or are still a MENSA candidate. OK, relax, clear your
mind and . . . begin.

1. What do you put in a toaster?

The answer is bread. If you said "toast", then give up now and go do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread", go to question 2.
2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk". What do cows drink?

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk", please do not attempt the next question. Your brain is obviously overstressed and may even overheat. It may be that you need to content yourself with reading something more appropriate such as "Children's World". If you said, "water" then proceed to question three.

3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a greenhouse made from?

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks", what the heck are you still doing here reading these questions? If you said "glass", then go on to question four.

4. Twenty years ago, a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany. If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany. Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he has time and the plane crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany. Where would you bury the survivors - East Germany or West Germany or in "no man's land"?

Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else, you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated. If you said, "Don't bury the survivors" then proceed to the next question.

5. If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60th of a degree every minute then how many degrees will the hour hand move in one hour?

Answer: One degree. If you said "360 degrees" or anything other than "one degree", you are to be congratulated on getting this far, but you are obviously out of your league. Turn your pencil in and exit the room. Everyone else proceed to the final question.

6. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on. In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?

Answer: Oh, for heaven sake! It was YOU, Read the first line!!!

( www.basicjokes.com/djoke.php?id=745 )

Val

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SIRIRADHA's Photo SIRIRADHA Posts: 15,470
7/12/10 9:41 A

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Yow! That's a man living a very dangerous life!

Join us on the Happy Hippies team--looking for fun and feeling groovy!


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7/8/10 1:34 P

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emoticon that'll teach Rick, won't it...pay attention husbands everywhere!

STRAWBERRYLASS's Photo STRAWBERRYLASS Posts: 62,038
7/8/10 12:26 A

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I will certainly pray for poor poor Rick. But, what in smart gift idea.


emoticon

"IN VINO VERITAS"


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7/7/10 3:20 P

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Missing Husband

Rick was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry.

She told him 'Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less than 6 seconds, AND IT BETTER BE THERE!!

The next morning Rick got up early and left for work.

When his wife woke up She looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, and brought the box back in the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Rick has been missing since Tuesday. Please pray for him.


Val

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5/15/10 3:44 A

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emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

BELIEVE
Tomorrow never comes, so enjoy today!
You have come to far, to be controlled by a cookie!
The first step to resisting temptation is wanting to!
Let us give thanks this month and each day.


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SIRIRADHA's Photo SIRIRADHA Posts: 15,470
3/29/10 10:35 A

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OMG! I have tears streaming down my face! That was just wonderful! I am going to share this with everyone!

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STRAWBERRYLASS's Photo STRAWBERRYLASS Posts: 62,038
3/29/10 2:54 A

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Thanks Val for that laugh. I am passing it on to some of my co-workers which I am sure will get a kick out it.

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"IN VINO VERITAS"


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CD1928831 Posts: 17,679
3/27/10 1:20 A

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What a hoot!!
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CD2737813 Posts: 2,651
3/26/10 10:23 P

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That really was a good laugh. I think the most clever part was the kisses.

Shirley

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3/26/10 8:43 P

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Thanks -- just what the dr. ordered for today -- a good emoticon

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3/26/10 7:59 P

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My hubby & I got a great laugh out of this. Thanks!

DAWN: Proud Leader of the ROCKIN' RED FOXES

QUOTE: "To love another person is to see the face of God." -Victor Hugo

CD4664429 Posts: 7,302
3/26/10 2:36 P

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OMG!!!! That's just what I needed today! Thank you!!!

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3/26/10 10:51 A

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Laughter is healthy and good for the soul!! Another member left this on my blog today and it's the best laugh I've had in awhile!!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=2a2DQC-ghio

Enjoy!!!

Val

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Motivation gets you started, habit keeps you going!

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